Three Years Ago...

...I experienced the greatest joy and relief of my life - Eleanor was born.  Sometimes I debate what was worse in the moment, losing Sophie or the constant and gripping fear I would lose Eleanor.  It was just like my loss was played out on repeat throughout my pregnancy, when I was sure Eleanor, too, would slip away.  You can imagine then my utter astonishment and joy when, three years ago, she was born, pink, sweet, and screaming.  She completed me.  She was a different entity - new, whole, perfect, wonderful Eleanor.  A little girl like nothing I'd ever known.  My Eleanor.

(2007)

Today, she is a hilarious, bright, verbal, passionate, three year old Rapunzel-Pixie hybrid.  She is everything I didn't know she'd be - she loves getting dirty, pink-and-fuschia, dancing, popcorn, ponies, crafty things, fashion, animals, her Cowwy Boy, zucchini, Josephine, "her friends," and lollipops.  She lifts me up when she tells me she loves me and my heart breaks for her when she gets disappointed on the playground.  She makes me laugh with her pleasant and mature sense of humor, and cry with her depth of feeling. 

(2008)

I couldn't feel luckier than to have been with her these last three years.  The light in my life is very bright.  I am surrounded by blue eyes, little sticky hands, sweet soft songs ("Once a time, there was a butterfly, flappin' her wings..."), and distinct aesthetic demands.

(2009)

And my goodness - I love her.  Happy Birthday, Sweet Sass.

(2010)

I love you, Ella Bella.

Also, my warmest thoughts go out to our sweet friends of Team Llewellyn.  We love you.

And, I hereby proclaim that I will be posting more.  Seriously.  There will be a post coming on *not* posting.