You might have heard I have some anxiety.

Ha.  Like, occasionally crippling.  Wrenching.  Anxiety. 

I have made a lot of progress over the last 4 years.  But, my pregnancy with Eleanor was certainly the high point of my neurosis.  Sure, I know what you'll say, I had good reason.  I know.  And, now I'm at the point where I am pretty stable most of the time.  (I almost wrote "I am pretty relaxed," but that is a wild overstatement.)  I do function though. 

I won't go into how socially anxious I've been in the last month or so.  But, I will mention my continued (waxing and waning) nervousness about the kids' health.  And, really, to be honest - Eleanor's health.  Of course, I care just as much about Josephine's health.  But, JoButter is a chubby, extremely active toddler.  She eats like a champ.  She is constantly in motion.  Eleanor is much more whimsical and waif-like.  She is a pixie size-wise.  And let's face it, from day one of her little life, all I've known is to worry about her survival. She is long on personality, but sometimes, her tiny size coupled with how little she eats makes me nervous to say the least. 

I know, those things alone are silly to fret about.  But, I've been worrying that she's more tired than usual.  True, she doesn't nap.  And, true we've been very busy the last few weeks, where we've spent most of the Winter in hibernation mode.  And, mostly, she's getting to be a kid, so she doesn't want to run around the house with abandon.  And, if you've seen her out and about, you know she doesn't tire out with great ease. 

So, now I've made myself feel silly.  But, I can't help but be nervous.  I know from real life that scary things can happen (and the internet certainly doesn't help allay those fears).  It is very likely that everything is fine.  She never gets sick, nor does she have any symptoms of any bigger problems.  And, everyone I know tells me I'm being crazy.  (And they have been saying it since she was a newborn.)  But, my goodness, I love these girls.  I just want them to be safe and healthy, and I harry myself about them in the only ways I know how.

That's it for now.